To Open Your Marriage...or Not

by Dr. Denise Renye

Opening up a marriage can be a difficult decision, and there are many factors to consider before making such a choice. One of the most important factors to consider is the level of emotional and sexual intimacy you currently have with your partner. If you feel that your relationship lacks depth and emotional connection, you may be tempted to seek out new partners as a way of filling this void.

However, it's important to remember that opening up a marriage is not a magic solution to relationship problems. In fact, if you and your partner are struggling to connect emotionally or sexually, introducing other partners into the mix can actually make things worse. Before making any decisions about opening up your marriage, it's important to address any underlying issues and work on building a stronger foundation of trust, communication, and intimacy with your partner.

Another factor to consider is your own emotional readiness for non-monogamy. It's natural to feel some level of jealousy or insecurity when considering the idea of sharing your partner with others, but if these feelings are overwhelming or difficult to manage, it may be a sign that you are not yet ready for an open relationship. It's important to take the time to understand your own feelings and motivations before making any decisions about non-monogamy.

It's also important to approach the idea of non-monogamy with a sense of honesty and integrity. If you are considering opening up your marriage because you want to explore new sexual experiences or because you are attracted to someone else, it's important to be open and honest with your partner about your desires. Trying to hide your feelings or pursue non-monogamy behind your partner's back is likely to cause more harm than good and can damage your relationship irreparably.

Ultimately, the decision to open up a marriage should be based on mutual respect, honesty, and a commitment to each other's well-being. If you and your partner are able to approach the idea of non-monogamy with an open and honest mindset, and if you are both genuinely interested in exploring this type of relationship, it can be a positive and fulfilling experience. However, if either of you are approaching the idea of an open marriage from a place of fear, avoidance, or dishonesty, it may be wise to seek the help of a qualified therapist or counselor to work through these issues before taking any further steps.

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