Finding a meaningful relationship in hookup culture can be challenging, but it's not impossible. By being clear about what you want, avoiding casual hookups, taking things slow, looking for like-minded individuals, being patient, open, and honest, and putting yourself out there, you can increase your chances of finding a meaningful relationship.

Emotional safety plays a crucial role in sexual pleasure. When we feel emotionally safe with our partner, we are more likely to be open, vulnerable, and willing to explore our desires and fantasies. When we trust our partner, we can let go of any inhibitions and fully immerse ourselves in the moment, leading to a more intense and fulfilling sexual experience.

Life after a divorce can be challenging, but it's important to focus on self-care, build a strong support system, set realistic goals, establish a new routine, let go of resentment, and take things slowly. By taking these steps, you can begin to rebuild your life and find happiness once again.

Working with a skilled therapist can be key in helping to heal the heartbreak that can accompany divorce. There are support groups also, to connect with others who are going through similar experiences.

Sleeping separately helps everyone get a better night’s sleep because they don’t have to contend with snoring, blanket-hogging, or different sleep schedules.

ATTUNEMENT: WHAT IS IT? WHY IS IT IMPORTANT?

There’s a very important factor that determines whether one or both parties in a relationship feel seen and nurtured. It applies to relationships across the board, from romantic to platonic, therapeutic to familial. And without it, miscommunication, fights, and hurt feelings are common. That factor is attunement. I’ll give the clinical definition first because it’s a word we often use in the field of psychotherapy and so you have a full picture of what attunement is and then I’ll describe attunement in layperson’s terms.

It may seem counterintuitive because romantic relationships are about intimacy and closeness, but what they really need to thrive and flourish is space. Happy, romantic relationships need space or one or both partners can feel suffocated, controlled, and dominated. Belgian psychotherapist Esther Perel discusses this topic extensively both in Ted Talks and her book Mating in Captivity.

When entering into a romantic, sexual, or emotional partnership, it’s important to match maturity levels. Being a match involves more than, “I like dogs, you like dogs; we’re good!” Three very basic areas to determine whether you’re a match involve the following:

When many people think of sex, they think of penis-in-vagina (PIV) intercourse. They may also think of orgasms and ejaculation. However, as a sexologist, I take a broader view of sex. There are at least five circles of sexuality, and I include foreplay as well as aftercare in the sexual experience. Foreplay and aftercare are just as important, even integral, for sex as orgasm and/or ejaculation.

From that lens, relationships not only support spiritual growth, the relationship itself is a spiritual practice. That’s true in the sense that relationships provide people with numerous opportunities to practice love, acceptance, understanding, and patience.

How much space does the couple want within the relationship itself? I see many couples in my private practice and often use the metaphor of a house to describe a relationship. Houses have a number of doors and windows. Each couple gets to decide how open and closed the windows and doors are for each person to feel safe in the relationship.

Last week I shared with you my perspective as a sexologist on the five circles of sexuality; this week, I want to share sensate focus with you as an exercise to facilitate sensual exploration and discovery with a partner.

When it comes to sexuality, most people think of, well, sex. This word is both loaded and very limited. However, there are so many other aspects of sexuality that don’t get nearly enough air time.