For someone with an injury or disability, sexual encounters can bring physical, emotional, and psychological complexities that require open communication to ensure safety, comfort, and pleasure. It’s perfectly reasonable to raise those complexities with your partner(s) because again, sex is about pleasure for everyone involved. People are not mind-readers and that means communicating what works and what doesn’t is paramount. That might mean not only expressing what feels good and what doesn’t, but also something specific such as a change in position, additional time, the need to adjust tempo or amount of lube, or specific forms of touch.
Read MoreGUEST BLOG. Exploring kinks and fantasies in a safe environment can be difficult if you’re not surrounded by a supportive and understanding community, or you don’t possess the knowledge and experience to handle such situations. The tips given above are some of the more easier ways to start building a place for yourself to safely explore your interests. Remember, sexuality is fluid and everyone’s interests and turn-ons are unique. Being open and non-judgmental about your fantasies can help you understand the meaning behind them and lead to a cathartic experience for your body and mind.
Read MoreAs we continue to engage in conversations about consent, it’s crucial to remember that it begins within us. It is about understanding our bodies, respecting our feelings, and making choices that align with our true desires. I am grateful for the insights gained from this workshop, as they not only enhance my clinical practice but also contribute to a more compassionate and just society.
I encourage my fellow clinicians and practitioners to explore the concepts presented by Dr. Betty Martin and Dr. Roger Kuhn. By doing so, we can collectively work towards a future where consent is not just an agreement but a fundamental right—a practice woven into the very fabric of our interactions, both personal and societal.
Read MoreIt’s incredibly difficult to unwind the knot of trauma and process these fears, especially when it seems like the solution is just to couple up. However, that doesn’t address the root cause, or help the inner child because really what that wounded self is looking for is a parent. That scared part wants someone to be with them all the time to love them and take care of them. Even the best partners are only capable of so much because they, too, are human.
Read MoreAromantics can also experience love even if they don’t fall in love. In my work as a Bay Area sex therapist, I remind folx that love comes in all forms – there’s love for family, friends, pets, nature, the self. . .Romantic love is not the end-all-be-all form of love that our society makes it out to be. Aromanticism challenges societal norms that prioritize romantic relationships and offers a valid and fulfilling way of connecting with others on different levels.
Read MoreWhen relationship or intimacy issues arise, finding specialized support can make all the difference. In Pennsylvania, online sex therapy has made it possible for residents across the state—and especially in Philadelphia—to access professional guidance from the comfort of their own homes. Whether you’re navigating concerns with sexual desire, communication, intimacy, or personal exploration, online sex therapy provides a compassionate space for individuals and couples alike.
Read MoreThis dynamic reflects the patriarchal system that often prioritizes men's desires and choices over the emotional well-being of women. Under patriarchy, infidelity is framed as a man's lapse in judgment, and women are seen as “victims” or “homewreckers,” rather than fully formed humans with agency. Patriarchy perpetuates the belief that men can seek fulfillment outside their commitments while women are left to deal with the fallout.
Read MoreFor many individuals and couples, navigating relationship and intimacy concerns can be challenging. In Colorado, there is growing access to professional support through online sex therapy, making it easier than ever to receive specialized care no matter where you live. Whether you’re in Denver, Boulder, Colorado Springs, or as far west as Telluride, online sex therapy provides the opportunity to connect with a licensed therapist from the comfort of your own space.
Read MoreThrough online sex therapy, individuals and couples can address relationship and intimacy concerns, improve communication, and gain insight into their own sexual identities and needs. Ultimately, the goal is to build a foundation for healthier relationships, deeper intimacy, and more fulfilling connections.
In Oregon, online sex therapy is an empowering option for those ready to take the next step toward understanding themselves and their relationships on a deeper level.
Read MoreTrauma, whether emotional or physical, leaves an indelible mark on the psyche. Emotional abuse can include verbal attacks, emotional manipulation, and neglect of emotional needs. Physical abuse encompasses acts of violence or physical harm, while neglect involves the failure to meet basic emotional and physical needs. When these experiences remain unresolved, they create deep-seated fears and defensive mechanisms that can persist into adulthood. These fears often include anxiety about pain, abandonment, and rejection—experiences that were once life-threatening or profoundly hurtful.
Read MoreManaging SSRI sexual side effects involves a comprehensive approach that includes medication management, lifestyle adjustments, psychological support, and sexual health education. By addressing these aspects, in my work as a Bay Area sexologist I support my clients in maintaining both their mental health and their sexual well-being, ultimately leading to a more fulfilling and balanced life.
Read MoreAs the patriarchy is crumbling and the divine feminine is rising, we’re seeing more public examples of men who are bucking the “traditional” masculine way of being that eschews vulnerability and intimacy. They are challenging the status quo perception of masculinity and that means their partners are forced to confront their own ingrained beliefs as well.
Read MoreWith awareness, compassion, and a willingness to confront past wounds, it is possible to overcome the fear of intimacy and embrace the vulnerability that intimacy requires. As a Marin County sex therapist, it is deeply rewarding to work with clients who move through these fears and into more fulfilling, connected relationships.
Read MoreIn a sex-positive framework, which I practice as a Bay Area sex therapist and psychologist, consensual adult sexual expressions are valid and worthy of respect. This means I view foot fetishes not as a disorder or abnormality but as a natural variation of human sexuality. The sex-positive approach is grounded in the belief that sexual diversity is a normal and healthy part of life. It challenges the notion that only certain types of sexual expressions are acceptable and encourages people to explore and express their sexuality in ways that feel authentic and fulfilling to them.
Read MoreThe key to a more intimate sex life is open communication, mutual respect, and a willingness to explore and connect with your partner on multiple levels. It's important to understand each other's needs and desires and to create an environment that encourages trust and vulnerability.
Read MoreIdentifying the traits of an emotionally available person can help you assess a potential or current partner and also demonstrate where either or both of you could use some support. Emotional availability is a spectrum whereby some people are more available than others. In other words, every person can become more emotionally available, if they choose. And if they do, I bet they’ll find deeper and more meaningful connections.
Read MoreGone are the days when marriage meant being with someone solely for the sake of fulfilling societal expectations or securing financial stability. Now people seek partners who offer emotional availability, understanding, and support. They desire relationships built on mutual respect, shared values, and a sense of partnership. They want companions who enhance their lives and share their journeys. People want a partner who listens with empathy, communicates openly, and demonstrates emotional maturity. It’s part of the reason I’ve seen an uptick in requests for premarital counseling – modern couples recognize marriage takes effort and they want to enter their marriage with as many tools in their toolbox as possible.
Read MoreOur society places a premium on achieving orgasm as the pinnacle of sexual satisfaction so it's easy to lose sight of the many other forms of pleasure that can be found along the way. While orgasms can certainly be a pleasurable and fulfilling part of sex for many people, they are by no means the sole measure of sexual satisfaction, especially when you factor in the issues surrounding orgasms.
Read MoreVibrators can contribute to stress relief, relaxation, and enhanced blood flow, potentially leading to better sexual health. For some people, a vibrator can also help with pain relief, particularly for menstrual cramps or pelvic discomfort. And for people who want to use a vibrator for more than masturbation, it can promote intimacy and communication with a partner. As a Marin County sex therapist, I work with couples around communication and sometimes even how sexual expression could include toys.
Read MoreTrauma leaves a lasting impact on a person’s sense of self and affects their mental well-being and intimate connections. There are many ways the body can process trauma and one of them is ethical, consensual fetish and kink play. A fetish is a behavior that someone cannot get sexually aroused without whereas kink is an activity or behavior someone enjoys that goes outside the bounds of “traditional,” or “vanilla” sex. A person may get incredibly turned on by a kink, but not necessarily need it to get off. If they do, it becomes a fetish. Fetishes may be kinks, but not all kinks are fetishes.
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